Determination
by Novie Vantas
Summary: It's April 13th, 2013 and John Egbert's 15th birthday. And for this very special birthday, his dad is allowing him to adopt a troll! John is both excited and overwhelmed with this and almost can't choose, until he discovers something about a certain little red blooded troll that he simply can't ignore.
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

Mr. Charles Egbert was excited for his son. Of course, John had been talking about how awesome trolls were and it was finally his 15th birthday and the occasion was right. With more than enough money in the bank, John could get any classed troll he wanted, and that's exactly how Charles planned it to go. He was going to get John any troll he wanted and then they were going out for ice cream (Bruster's. John's favorite). He pulled up to the troll adoption center and led his blind folded son to the door and removed the blind fold. "Happy Birthday, son."

Chapter 1

Said son' name is John Egbert and god damn he was excited! 'My dad was finally going to let me get my own little troll!' He thought to himself. He bolted into the place, looking at all the trolls. All of them were so cute! There was this new family rounding the corner. This new family consisted of a mother, a kid with a face splitting smile, and a little troll with horns that looked too big for his own good. The kid looked about to burst with excitement and the little troll with the Mohawk looked just as well. That made him even **more** excited, if that was possible. The trolls here had obviously recently outgrew their wriggler legs, as the little notches that came from the process were puffy. They all had on these little shirts that kept the troll blood colored obtrusions exposed. John guessed it helped with the pain. Another tell tale sign of them recently becoming of age is their heights. Of course he knew that trolls grew slightly slower than humans did, but they were barely knee high.

After walking through that section, he rounded the corner where the kid and his new troll came from. 'Low Bloods' was written in a curly font on a sign. "Young man, you're in the lowblood section." A perky woman came from behind a door labeled "Authorized Personnel Only" holding a little troll with a double set of seriously pointy horns and bi-colored red and blue eyes. "I know. It's my birthday and my dad said I could get any one I wanted." John replied, rather proudly. "Are you sure you don't want a cute little blue blood or something?" he chuckled. "Honestly, I don't know. A troll is a troll though, regardless of blood color." It was her turn to chuckle, as she placed the little dude in a display cage with one who looked like him, but had more hair. "Well, I have the perfect little guy for you. Wait right here." She says, disappearing behind the door again. John goes over to the cage and squats next to "Sollux and Mituna". The cages looked like a bunch of baby gates put together, where they couldn't get out themselves, but they could be lifted out if need be. They both toddled over to the part he was at and reached for him. He stuck both hands in, scratching them both under the chin, causing them to giggle. Then, all of a sudden, John's glasses were being lifted off his face and the little one with all the hair was giggling like crazy with little sparks of blue and red around his eyes and horns. "Hey!: John laughed, and tried to get his glasses back from the suspension they were going through. Surprisingly enough, the little guy's psionics were stronger than him probably and John had a fun time tousling with the tyke for his glasses back.

"Now, Mituna, give the young man his glasses back." The woman came from behind the door with a little blob of grey and black in her arms. His glasses were returned, crookedly, onto his face and John could see that it was a troll. This little troll has really nubby horns, like they'd just grown tall enough to peak through his hair. He seemed to be clinging to her for dear life. "This little one is Karkat. He just lost his wriggler legs a week ago." She handed him Karkat's clipboard.

Name: Karkat Vantas

Age: 2

Weight: 2.05 lbs.

John looked at Karkat. He looked like he should've been heavier than that. He shrugged.

Horns: 3 inches

Hair Color: Black

Eye Color: Grey

Medical Information: Healthy. No conditions.

Special: None

Ancestors: Karkat came from a long line of distinguished worker trolls with…..

John began to skim over the information. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, until John got to the last page of the overview. The one sentence that was on that page formed a lump in John's throat and made his heart and stomach drop. In the curly, yet elegant font the adoption center used:

Euthinization Date: April 13, 2013


	2. Chapter 2

John almost dropped the clipboard. "Ah, you found it?" the woman's smile seemed a little less perky. "His previous owner said that Karkat bit him. Now, I don't believe it, and there was no proof, but here we do not allow biting trolls. Liability risks, you know?" she said sadly. John tried to clear the lump in his throat. "Can I hold him?" John breathed and the woman smiled. "Of course! You can hold any troll out there," she tickles Karkat's side and he lets her go long enough for her to hand him off to John. He clings to John just as well, but looks up at John to observe him. He truly looked like a toddler. Chubby cheeks and big grey eyes. "Hello there, Karkat." he smiled at the troll. How could anything this cute bite someone? John refused to believe it. "He looks like a keeper, John. He already seems to like you too." John's dad said from behind him, strangely pipe free. That must've been what took him so long. Now that he thought about it, John did see a No Smoking sign out front. "Yeah. His name is Karkat." he replied, taking one hand and playing with Karkat's hair. Charles cocked an eyebrow and brushed his hand over Karkat's wriggler legs, causing the troll to let out a squeak and bury his face into John's chest. "Those are still very sensitive for him, as he just lost them." she said, gently moving Charles' hand from the troll's side. "I want him, dad." John said, smiling. Charles' hand moved up to his mouth, an automatic motion for when he was thinking (usually for holding his pipe when he's taking a long drag from it and thinking about something deeply). "Alright, son. I did promise you any one you wanted." he agreed, resting a huge fatherly hand on John's shoulder. "Great! Follow me and we'll get the paperwork, licenses, transactions, first time owner guides, and help booklets. As well as a complementary first toy for Karkat!" she exclaimed.

It was then that it hit John. Her face seemed to lighten up when he said "A troll is a troll." she knew that once he read his rap sheet, that he would want to adopt Karkat. In a way, she influence his decision. That little display of "Oh, you found it?" accompanied with the sad smiling. She'd planned it! That old trickster! John took a look down at little Karkat and realized for the first time that he was a little heavier than usual and that he was sleep. Poor little fellow. Must've been terribly tired and afraid. 'I would be afraid on my die day too.' he thought to himself, involuntarily shifting Karkat from his non-dominant hand to the dominant one. 'He'll never have to worry about that again. I'll take care of you, Karkat. I promise.'


	3. Chapter 3

((Sorry, this one is rather long .))

"Alright and Mr. Egbert. I'll need the owner to sign here." the perky woman, whose name John learned as Cynthia, said offering a document with government looking stamps across the top. She had already signed her name, as well as Karkat's. John shifted Karkat back over to his non-dominant arm and wrote his name on the line. "You could also fill in Karkat's last name." she added, pointing the the space on the line after 'Karkat' in the middle of the paper. John had the hugest smile on his face as he wrote 'Egbert' on the line. His name was now officially 'Karkat Egbert'. John wondered momentarily if this is what first time mothers thought as they were handed their baby for the first time. "Now, I want you to write down your name, address, and contact number so that I can program a tracking chip." she said, handing him a notepad. John wrote that down as well. "I'll be back soon." she smiled, exiting the room with the notepad in hand. John ran his hands through Karkat's hair, causing him to purr lightly in his sleep. John chuckled softly and continued to paw through his hair.

After about five minutes, Cynthia returned with a small chip and a red collar with a silver tag hanging from it. "Now, here is his tracking chip and his collar." she said, raising each as she called their names. "His tracking chip has all your information on it and could locate him anywhere. It doesn't matter where it's put, but once it's there it cannot be moved again by non surgical means." she raised the collar. "A troll, by government law, is characterized as a pet. Now, that doesn't mean that he'll always need his collar on, but some establishments won't allow him in their doors without it. Liability risks, you know." John nodded. He'd already planned it. He'd taken a class in baby care his first year of highschool. He knew he'd have to have a bag with everything he needed in it, and the collar was going to be in that bag until Karkat was forced to have it on. "Now. Back to the chip. It's thin and it doesn't make any noises. Most owners choose to put it on the back of the ear so it can't be bothered. Shall I put it there?" she asked and John nodded, exposing Karkat's ear for her. She looked at each side of the ship carefully, before choosing a side that looked seriously sharp. "Will it ever, like, move or anything?" he asked as she disinfected the area on the back of Karkat's ear. "No. Despite the sharp look of it, it cannot cut through anything without the correct force necessary." she said, positioning it, and then pushing it into the skin on Karkat's ear. The small troll reacted immediately, grabbing fistfulls of John's shirt and hissing lightly. Cynthia expertly moved her hand and placed a cotton ball there and then taped it down with medical tape John hadn't even seen her bring. "All done, Karkat. You were a big boy." she refixes his hair over his ear. She handed John the collar, which Karkat reached for so John let him hold it. "Now, follow me please and we'll get his first toy, bucket, and new owner's guide and you'll be on your way!" she said cheerfully, leading them back into the lowbloods area and behind the door John had originally seen her from.

What John saw did wonders on his eyes. It was like a kindergarten play area! Animals, shapes, and colors everywhere! "His pile is over here." she said, gesturing to an area of the room that had piles of plush toys and blankets everywhere. They stopped to one with grey and red Cancer symbols on the blankets and pillows. "Set him down there and let him choose something from his pile." she directed and Karkat was ever so willing to oblige. John sat Karkat down and Karkat looked ready to run to his pile, but he looked down at his hands, and then back to John and offered John the collar. After making sure John had it (he's took John's fingers and individually wrapped them around the collar to make sure he didn't drop it), he took off into his pile. He rolled in the pile, digging around into it for a minute until he found what he was looking for. A stuffed crab that was about the size of Karkat's chest. "Is that what you want to take to your new home, Karkat?" Cynthia asked and Karkat looked from the pile to the Crab and nodded. He then went back over to John with both his arms up in a clear demand of "up". John complied, picking him up. "Karkat? Can I hold your crab for a minute? I promise I'll bring it back." she asked, reaching for the crab and Karkat handed to her, repeating what he did to John to make sure she didn't drop it. "Thank you. I'll be right back." she disappeared once again with the crab, but came back faster than when she programmed the chip. "Alright. Here you are, Karkat." she handed him the crab and his face lit up almost immediately. "Here, Gamzee also wanted you to have this." she handed him a little horn that John remembered a little purple blood had when he first walked in. He grabbed that too, putting it together with his crab and snuggled it. "He'd formed a little moireillegence with Gamzee, so I gave him a comfort item, and Gamzee rubbed the crab in his hair to get his scent. Now. About your guide. It's more of a book. She said, producing a small hard cover book with the title "Your First Troll! A Guide To How To Keep Them Happy!" John tucked the book under his arm. "It'll answer any questions you have. If there's something you absolutely don't know or if something happens, I've put my number on the inside cover. Just give me a call and I'll help you through it." she smiled. "Let's go." she led both Egberts back to the Highblood area.

"That's about it! Thank you for choosing Troll Hopes Adoption Center!" she smiled, bringing her hands together. John thanked her and Charles walked towards the door, waiting to open it. As John made his way through the highblood area, the little purple blood "HONK!"-ed at Karkat, and the troll's head snapped to him. Karkat produced a series of clicks and climbed down John's side to get to Gamzee. He stuck his fingers through the cage, index and middle finger's extended like a sideways 2 and Gamzee replied with the same motion, but with three fingers, the first and last touching Karkat's two. Gamzee made another series of clicks and Karkat responded with another patterns as well, pulled his hand back and went back up to John with the "up" arms again. John picked him up and he rested his head on John's shoulder, looking at Gamzee. The small high blood "honk."-ed again, waving and Karkat waved back, John walked a little faster, because if Karkat and Gamzee decided to hug, he'd cry, feeling bad for separating two trolls who'd probably been best friends all their lives.


	4. Chapter 4

Seeing as how Karkat was practically conjoined with his shirt, John sat in the back seat with him, putting the seat belt across them both.. The cancer's ear flickered slightly. The left one, where the chip was put in. It must've been like an ear piercing or something. Not that John had any of those dreadful things. He had no need for them. He'd almost forgotten about the bucket the woman at the front desk had shoved into his arms as he left, and looked over at it. What was it's purpose? Did they carry their personal belongings in the bucket? Just then Cynthia's words rang out. "If you have any questions, the first time owner's guide will help you." So John felt around the seat until he got the book, pulling it on the side of his lap Karkat wasn't taking up, and opening it.

The book was kinda like a dictionary. From A to Z there were tips and guidelines as to how to keep trolls happy and healthy. Flipping to the B section, John couldn't help but wonder how jealous his friends would be. Jade had Bec, so she probably would be happy for John and whatever, but he and Dave had been talking about trolls since they were legalized as pets. He fought the urge to reach into his pocket, sign in to pesterchum, and brag about it, but that was impossible since his phone was in his back pocket and there happened to be two heavy objects occupying his lap. He looked for B-U until he found it. The only section of B-U, then it moved on to Cancer, which John hoped he'd never have to face.

**_Buckets_**

**_Buckets were originally used to transport their genetic material to their female of mass production (mother grub) for her to hatch more eggs and continue the species. Now, they are used to rid the trolls of the excess genetic material that accumulates over periods of time. How to use the buckets are the last lessons they learn from their brooding mothers (Jade bloods) before leaving the brooding caverns to become either worker or companion trolls. Of course, trolls of younger ages will time to time need help with their bucket, as they are young and really don't understand how it works._**

**_How do I know when my troll needs to use their bucket?_**

**_Statistics show that when a trolls needs to release genetic material, they become very grouchy. Snappy if you will. Their skin begins to tint the color of their blood, the most obvious spots the tip of the ears and the tip of the nose. Providing a mean amount of time between each bucket filling session is just about impossible, as it varies from troll to troll. Not filling a bucket over an amount of time could lead to sickness and death, as it is just as a human female keeping a dead fetus in her stomach._**

**_What do I do with the genetic material once it's in the bucket?_**

**_Troll genetic material is about as thick as milk. Rich in the chromosomes needed to produce more wrigglers, but not too thick. This substance can be safely put down any drain with water to chase the color of the material away._**

**_Where do I keep the bucket?_**

**_Usually under a bathroom sink; somewhere your troll can get ahold of it and put it back themselves. They don't like for it to be anywhere in plain sight, as it is the equivalent to leaving out human sex toys or used condoms._**

John frowned. So Karkat had to...you know...in that bucket? Ew. Under the sink it shall stay until needed. He took the time to look at the tip of Karkat's ears and his nose. They all seemed skin toned and Karkat was a little angel right now, so he'd definitely keep that out of sight. John hadn't noticed that they were in the parking lot of Bruster's until his dad turned the ignition of the car off and opened his door. He made sure to grab Karkat's collar and put it in his pocket, just in case they wanted to be uppidy about the little troll. John started a mental checklist of things he'd have to get Karkat once his allowance started up again next month. First on the list: Shoes. He didn't expect Karkat to walk on the hot cement and put him down once they got to the door and was about to step in, which Karkat began to protest but he still had his crab in one hand, so John gave him his finger to hold for security. As they walked in, people stared at them. As far as he knew, this location was pet friendly. The last time he was in here a woman was sharing a vanilla cone with her dog. "Welcome to Brusters! What can I get you two?" she asked, mostly staring at John. "A large chocolate, a medium butter pecan and a kid sized vanilla." Charles responded smoothly, fishing out a 20 dollar bill. "Your total is $19.93." she replied, giving them strange looks. She seemed to be counting them, mouthing "one, two" she went over to the counter, scooping out John's dad's large chocolate cone, and handing it to him, John's medium butter pecan and handing it to him, and then a small plastic cup of vanilla with a spoon and handing it to Charles. Who gave it to John, who held it and looked excited, just to bother that poor woman who by this point was looking very confused. They went to sit at a booth, John sitting Karkat's cup over near the window and then helping him into the booth and sitting there.

Karkat looked longingly at the cup of ice cream in front of him, but seemed afraid to touch it. "Karkat, you can have the cup of ice cream." John said finally after watching the troll fidget for a whole five minutes. Karkat looked from John to the ice cream and back to John. "...arket 'ave?" he asked quietly, making John want to squeal. "Yeah, you can have it. It's really good." he said, scooping some on a spoon and putting it near Karkat's mouth. "Open your mouth." John smiled and Karkat complied and then John put the ice cream in his mouth. The amount of expressions that went across Karkat's face was astounding. Until finally he settled for joy, waited for John to give the spoon back, and made a sticky, ice cream mess out of everything. "'cream good!" Karkat smiled when he was done with his cup. John was done with his as well. "Karkat, you've got ice cream everywhere. You need a bath." John chuckled. "'rket bath?" he asked and John nodded. "You're all sticky." "icky." Karkat replied, poking at his shirt. "On icky?" he asked and it took John a minute to realize that to Karkat, his name was 'On' until he could pronounce it. "Well, no. I'm not sticky." Karkat frowned. "On no bath with rket?" he asked, slaying his own name as well as John's. "You want me to take a bath with

you?" John asked and Karkat nodded. "On take bath with Rket. Dad too." he said, pointing to Charles. "Hm? No. I think I'll take a shower by myself, thanks Karkat." Karkat tilted his head. "Oh." Charles got up and stretched. "You boys ready to go?" he asked and John stood up to. "Go 'ome?" Karkat asked and John nodded. "Yeah, Karkat! You get to see where your new home is!" Karkat grabbed his crab and held up his arms. John would've made him walk but the asphalt outside was still probably hot as hell, and Karkat looked so sleepy that he probably wouldn't be able to walk. So he picked up Karkat, ice cream and all, and carried him to the car. Where he fell asleep as soon as the engine came on.


	5. Chapter 5

Once back in their own driveway, John opened the car door and lifted himself and Karkat out of it. With Karkat sleeping like a log on one shoulder, and the other arm filled with toys, a book, and a bucket he looked like a father after a tiring morning at the fair. His own father chuckled. "You'll know how to take care of your kid when you're older better than the mother will." Charles said, opening the door. "Ha, ha, ha dad. Very funny." John smiled, walking through the door. He immediately went up the stairs to put all his cargo down. Of course, Karkat didn't let go of John's shirt and in a way that was a good thing. That meant the sticky that Karkat had on him and shared with John wouldn't get on his bed where he dumped the rest of Karkat's stuff from under his arm. "Karkat? Karkat? Wake up." he says, shaking his shoulder slightly. "Bath time." he says, as the troll stirs lightly. "Ome?" He asked in a voice that could melt a drill Sergeant. "Yeah. We're home. It's bath time too." He said, pulling Karkat's shirt over his head. "On and Rket take bath?" He asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Of course." He said, leading him to the upstairs bathroom, which was the room adjacent to his. John stripped and ran a bubbly bath. He stepped over in the water and sunk down, as Karkat climbed over the edge of the tub, splashing lightly. John handed Karkat a rag with soap on it. "Rub this where the ice cream was and you'll be clean in no time. " he'd said, closing his eyes and relaxing.

A few minutes passed and John could hear Karkat splashing around in the water. The splashing stopped before he could say anything about it, so he kept his eyes closed. Then, he could feel Karkat just about scrubbing the skin on his chest off. (Along with any hopes and dreams of chest hair). "On wash too." He demanded, giving John the rag. "Keen in no time." He said, repeating what John had said, sinking down into the water. The plan all along was to let Karkat wash first anyway, so he guessed this was Karkat's way of saying he was done. As he washed, he began to wonder how he was going to wash Karkat's hair. Maybe he'd get one of those extended nozzles for showers as just hook it up to his faucet. That was another thing on the to buy list he guessed. Shoes and a shower nozzle.

"Alright Karkat. I'm done." He said, wringing the rag out and then throwing it with the dirty clothes. The once white rag was yellow tinted with vanilla ice cream remains. John stood up, leaned over and picked up one of the fluffy towels he'd picked up on his way here, and wrapped Karkat in it. He took the other one and tied it around his waist. Karkat yawned. He remembered something about trolls being very heat sensitive and he guessed that the warm water plus the towel, plus the fact that John was treating him like a toddler made the troll even more sleepy than he was. "Pile?" Karkat asked, rubbing his arms with the part of the towel he could manage. He was rather drowsy and afternoon naps were common with young children. "A pile?" he asked. Of course, Karkat had that pile of Cancer related items and the stuffed toys. "You can sleep on my bed until we find the perfect pile material. Of course, it'll just be an extra set of my old ghostbusters bed sheets and a few stuffed animals but because it's my birthday month, I don't get an allowance." Karkat rubbed his eyes and John plopped him down on his bed. "Birthday." Karkat said. It turns out when the little troll got tired he said the last word of every sentence.

John pulled out a shirt that he didn't wear often enough and pulled it over Karkat's head. He looked down at the white shirt with the Ghostbusters logo on it and then back to John. "Rket's?" he asked and John nodded. "What's mine is your, little dude." he smiled. Karkat grabbed his crab from off the bed where John had dumped all their stuff, kicked the bucket off the bed with a frown and crawled up to the head of the bed and latched to one of the pillows. John chuckled and placed the horn on the bedside table beside his laptop he's received his 14th birthday. Karkat had crawled to the side that had the bed against the wall so John merely climbed onto the bed, grabbing his laptop. It was time to brag, and boy was Dave in for it.

* * *

Hey guise! I really just wanted to let you know that I really appreciate all the love you guys are sharing with me about this story. It started off as a silly idea I had, "Hey, what if trolls were like little pets?" and here it is, already five chapters all within a week. I've never been so excited about writing anything, let alone excited enough to update everyday. You guys are my inspiration and I love you~

-NV


	6. Chapter 6

{EctoBiologist [EB] began pestering TurntechGodhead [TG] at 1:23 P. M.}

EB: Dave!

EB: you'll never guess what happened! :B

TG: woah Egbert.

TG: before you flip your everlovin shit

TG: I've got something to tell you too.

EB: okay. You first.

TG: me, bro, and dirk are moving to Florida.

John was so excited, it took all he could not to squeal and wake Karkat from his sleep.

TG: Egbert, you haven't had some sort of dork overload have you?

EB: dave, that's great!

EB: do you know where?

TG: Bro found this old ranch somewhere around the outskirts of Talla-something.

EB: Tallahassee?

TG: yeah. that's it.

EB: dave, that's great!

EB: but

EB: why did your bro get a ranch?

TG: hell if I know.

TG: something about he and dirk working on mechanics in robots and opening a shop

TG: Well...mostly it's for dirk

TG: Bro's smuppet business is still booming

EB: Of course it is.

John had heard more than enough about the Smuppets and Puppets company that Bro Strider ran. He even called himself 'Bro Strider' on the fucking official labels. Dave had tricked John into Google Searching the company back when they first started chatting in 2011 when he was 13. The images of the women (and a few men too) shoving those thing in such unspeakable places made John shudder even now.

TG: John?

TG: now youve gone into your dork mode

EB: no, i'm still here

TG: good.

TG: don't get choked up on a few vibrating puppets

TG: i'll be sure to get you one.

EB: dont

TG: you said your favorite color is blue right?

EB: dave, seriously.

EB: leave the smuppets where they are

TG: i'll have it customized

TG: you still like ghostbusters, right?

EB: dave, i'm serious.

EB: i dont want a smuppet.

TG:calm your shit egbert.

TG: those things are hella high

TG: i wouldnt do that anyway

TG: i dont think i'd send a smuppet to my worst enemy.

TG: anyway

TG: what did you want to tell me, egbert?

EB: dad got me a troll for my birthday! :B

TG: holy shit nuggets.

TG: no way.

EB: yes way

TG: what class?

EB: red

EB: i couldve gotten any one i wanted though

EB: dad seemed to be eyeing a little fushia class that didnt have fins

TG: whyd you settle for the lowest class?

EB: the little guy is freakin adorable!

EB: not to mention that he was supposed to be put to sleep today :B

TG: you huge softy.

EB: well, i dont think he wouldve let me go anyway

EB: but he's still really cute

EB: I didn't give up anything

TG: true that.

TG: anyway the plane leaves in an hour and i still have to pack my laptop and make sure none of dirk's robotics will fuck up my turntables.

TG: i gotta go

EB: see ya dave.

TG: bye egderp

{turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 1:45 P.M. }

John chuckled. He wondered if Dave was going to be the same in person as he was online. Of course, John wasn't worried about physical features. They'd video chatted (John's request first) so that they knew what each other looked like and Dave had this habit of walking around the Strider household without a shirt on and Dave had caught John changing once(a story for later), so they both knew they were male. Why was John so worried? It was only Dave. He shrugged and began looking up snacks he could make for Karkat. He then inquired as to if Karkat was allergic to anything. Milk and cream were out. He ate that ice cream faster than a hunger bitten child. Peanuts were out too, since everything in Bruster's came in contact with peanuts at one point. John yawned. Maybe a little nap wouldn't be all that bad. And before he could even close the laptop he was out like a light.

Karkat woke up from his nap and looked around, slightly afraid. John, who had fallen asleep about 6 minutes prior to Karkat's awakening was sleeping in a sitting up position that Karkat didn't think was all that comfortable looking, his head lolled to the side, glasses askew on his face, mouth open slightly exposing bucked teeth that a good year or two of braces could fix. On the open computer screen was some mouth watering looking biscuit thing. He could barely speak the human's language, so reading was out of the question. The thought of reading made Karkat wonder what would happen if he spoke to his new master in Alternian. He wondered how John would responds to the clicks, snorts and sounds that made up the Alternian language. The thought of John's face looking confused made Karkat giggle. He looked down at the shirt he was wearing and took a sniff of it. It smelled like John and some sort of soap. He climbed down from the bed, leaving his crab on the edge for easy access when he returned and went to where he remembered the bathroom was.

After washing his hands in the bath tub (God that sink is high up) and flushing the toilet, Karkat bumped into Charles on his way back to John's room. "Hello Karkat." he greeted merrily, turning down a hallway that was right before John's room. He squeaked out a "Hi.". Why were humans so freaking tall? His den Jade blood had told him that he was eventually going to be taller than the human who adopted him. Stronger too. But at this point, Karkat couldn't see it.

As he pushed open John's room door and closed it behind him, the sound of the door's knob mechanism closing in place reminded Karkat of his previous family. It wasn't really any family he wanted to remember. Those people were the cruelest people Karkat had ever met. He didn't even know it was possible to be that evil. He shook his head as fear ran down his spine. They said they didn't want him, but what if they found him? He grabbed his crab off the edge of the bed and curled into John's side. What if they still wanted to hurt Karkat? Oh god, why did he remind himself of those people? Stupid ass door!

He accepted his fate as he drifted off into sleep. He knew the dreams were coming. The flashback of the terrible people from him home before. His only hope? That they wouldn't be as violent as the time Gamzee saw it.


	7. A story for now

"Alright, Egbert. Apparently Bro just came back from the store and I can hear bottle of apple juice calling my name from the bags. I'll be right back." Dave had said to John when they were video chatting. "Howie Mandel piss." John had replied, nodding. "What ever. I'll be right back." Dave said, sitting his laptop from his lap to his bed, giving John a full show of his chest, which was all bandaged up from Bro and Dave's "Strife" on the roof.

John personally thought it was abuse, but after Dave explained all the shit he'd done to Bro when it came to injuries, he became less worried. "And put a shirt on." he's said, chuckling. Dave's door closed, but not before Dave turned the camera towards him flicking John the bird and smirking, giving John a view of his purposely switching ass as he left the room, leaving the door slightly ajar. John had laughed, trying to eat his bowl of cereal at the same time and the spoonful of Cheerios did not make it's journey to his mouth before he bumped it with his chin, getting Cheerios and milk all over his shirt. He wouldn't have cared if the shirt wasn't white, the milk showed contrast, and Dave noticed every little thing. He wouldve sworn that John "beat the sausage" off of his little show. Dave had done it before. So, John threw the shirt off and rummaged through his drawers for a more tolerable white shirt.

He'd walked back to the computer with the shirt halfway over his head. He heard a wolf whistle and immediately pulled the shirt down completely. "Dave! How long have you been there?" he asked, blushing. "Long enough to confirm that you are indeed a boy and that a six pack looks totally out of place on you, considering your personality." he replied, taking a swig out of one of the many apple juice bottles he'd brought up to his room with you. "Oh shut up and drink your piss."


	8. Chapter 8

"Daddy! Daddy! Look at this one!" an excited 3 year old human said, offering his father a troll. Not just any troll. The troll was a young,, sweep old Karkat. The troll has being held upside down, meaning his butt was in the air and the child had a painfully tight grip on his abdomen where his wriggler legs were getting prepared to come off so that he could undergo his transformation into an adolescent troll. That wasn't helping anything. His Den Jade Blood had told him that for the rest of his life, he'd been selected to be a companion troll, despite his whole generation being worker trolls because of his class. "Well. If ya want it." he gruffed, handing over the $250 handling fee for the Black Marketed troll.

Laws make it whereas it isn't legal to sell trolls until their wriggler legs come off, but Karkat's Brooding Den had been ambushed and now there were about 200 less Jade Bloods and a whole den of trolls scattered about the black market.

The family threw Karkat into the pet carrier in the backseat of their minivan and despite the force Karkat genuinely thought the family cared for him.

His thoughts were proved wrong just about the very first day. Not only did his new family leave him in the human transport device over night without any food or water, they didn't retrieve him until the sun was high in the sky and it felt like an oven in the transportation device, not to mention his own body heat bouncing from the walls of the pet carrier back to him. He didn't have on any clothes whatsoever, because of the whole black market thing, but that helped with the heat a little. His hair flopped everywhere with the sweat and his other specifically troll parts were beginning to become restless, stretching away from his body to cool itself.

Suddenly the door to the car opened and the male adult reached into the pet carrier and grabbed Karkat roughly by the arm, yanked him into his arms and shut the door. "Look at cha, kid. I really shoulda left ya in the shop. The kid probably wont even rememba that he had me buy ya." he said, shaking his head. Karkat clung to this human. He seemed nice enough. "Dad, is that a troll?" an older human asked as he walked through the door. "Yeah. Yer brother spotted him yesterday during our trip an had me buy 'im." he replied, detaching Karkat and setting him on the floor. The younger of the two giants advanced towards Karkat and he hid behind the bigger one's legs. "Be social now, Karkat." he said, walking away. "I'll get yer shit ready in the kitchen."

The kid picked Karkat up by the tender skin on his neck, as if he were a dog, and carried him back to his room. He then threw the troll on his bed and retreated to a corner of his room where an expensive looking digital setup was, complete with recording software, cameras and a computer with blue LCD lights coming from the PC and the keyboard. "Yo." he began talking to the computer. "Access Granted." a robotic like voice came from the computer. "Google search. Trolls." he said, kicking his feet back. "Scanning." the computer replied. About three seconds later, the robotic female voice responded. "Over one million topics found." the kid put his feet back down and pulled himself up to the desk in the chair.

Karkat curled up on the spot he was placed in, deciding to relax in the cool air in the room, probably blowing from the vents over the boy's door. Karkat heard a sort of scratching noise, the boy scrolling through what seemed to be pages and pages of results. Suddenly, the scratching stopped, the chair made rolling noises and Karkat was being held like an animal again. One thing was off with the kid now though. He had this sort of...sick? (Karkat at the time had absolutely NO idea what the look meant) look on his face and his gaze was were Karkat's bulge had resheathed and curled up towards his body.

He put Karkat down on his back and ran his index finger over the sheathed bulge. It wiggled slightly and the boy's face lit up with a devious smile. He continued to stroke the curled organ until it was no longer curled, and the bulge itself was beginning to peak out. He took a hand and wrapped it around the sheath and stroked it lightly, coaxing the premature, fire-red tentabulge out and dancing. Karkat couldn't control this. The most he could do is pant and blush, both of which he was doing quite harshly. Coming straight from the Den, and not having his adolescent arms, he hadn't even been able to experiment with himself yet and as far as he knew, this human kid was magic.

Karkat squeezed his eyes shut and whimpered. His bulge betrayed his mind, wrapping itself around the kid's hand and dancing to his touch. Suddenly, the contact stopped and the kid, who had been kneeling in front of Karkat stood up. The bulge waved back and forth angrily like a flame, curling from side to side searching for the reason it's pleasure ended. Karkat didn't even get the chance to wonder what the kid was doing when all he felt was pain in his lower abdomen. He was pretty sure the kid was trying to tear him apart for some sort of sick experiment. "Shit…" the human hissed, leaning over Karkat, collecting his tiny wrists and holding them over his head. The pain in his lower abdomen never stopped, though Karkat could feel one human hand on his wrists, and another on his waist. He couldn't look though. His eyes were shut so tightly, he didn't even think he could open them if he tried.

Just when he thought it was over and the stinging, fire-like pain was nothing but stinging, the human moved. The ripping pain came back and the human moaned and made gross noises as something seemed to be tearing its way in and out of Karkat's nook. "Oh my g-" the human repeated over and over. Karkat just wished it would be over. None of it was pleasurable and quite honestly he couldn't believe his bulge came out for this type of abuse. Said bulge had flattened against Karkat's stomach, seemingly just as betrayed as Karkat himself.

This pain went on for 30 minutes, those minutes like eternities to the now uncontrollably sobbing troll. But finally it was over when the human stopped moving and there was some sort of something being released against the walls of Karkat's nook and the human nook was extracted. But Karkat was in no way finished as he thought. He human climbed over Karkat and shoved his bulge into the troll's mouth. "Suck it."

Karkat didn't like this. It tasted like his own blood and some other grossly grimy, gravel-textured something. Karkat felt like he was going to throw up. Not only was it being crammed down his throat, he couldn't breathe and his stuffy nose he'd gained from crying was helping that. He closed his mouth around the thing, trying to push it out with his tongue and every muscle in his mouth. Eventually, more of the substance that had been released into his nook was released down his throat and it took all he could not to throw up then and there. He stopped the ragged breathing he was managing around the human bulge to swallow more of the gravel-textured human release. It was then that the kid let go of Karkat, putting back on his clothes and going to sit back in front of his computer. Karkat whimpered and curled up in a ball again. He hurt all over. Head and down. Nothing about what the human did was fun and it was nothing he EVER wanted to do again.

Unfortunately for the troll, that's all he dreamt about. Every single time the human defiled him throughout the month he was in their care ran through his mind as he slept. Each time more and more intense.

* * *

Your name is John Egbert and you swear to god you think your troll just kicked you in so hard in the stomach your rib cracked.

John awoke with a start as Karkat was thrashing around with such a pained expression on his face, John didn't know how he was supposed to approach it. He set the laptop on top of the book on his nightstand and looked at Karkat. He was sweating little transparent red droplets against pale gray skin, writhing in what seemed to be pain and getting himself tangled in John's sky blue bedspread. John tried to shake his shoulder but that had to reaction. Then he tried whispering his name and shaking his shoulder but that didn't work. John even picked up Karkat. That calmed him slightly, but the whimpering and writhing didn't stop. Charles, who had been alerted on his way downstairs of the whimpering coming from John's room had his head peaked in the door, and eyebrow raised so high it was going to see the sun itself. John shrugged and eventually just held Karkat to his chest, whispering how it would be okay and stroking his hair in the way that made him purr usually and the little troll calmed down. He still sweated lightly and John carried him back to the tub and ran a little cold water in the bottom. He pulled the shirt over his head and placed him in the water in a sitting position, splashing his back, sides, and chest with the water.

Karkat awoke with a start. First the dreams mellowed out into a comforting hum that reminded him of his Den Jade Blood and then he was cold and wet. He looked at the offender, which happened to be John and began to cry. He didn't know why he was crying. He didn't know why he found himself clinging to John. He also didn't know why John didn't just slap him in his face, call him a pussy, and shove his head down the toilet.

But then he realized something.

John was not like his other family. John actually cared about him. And this made Karkat sob harder, taking fistfulls of John's shirt in his hands and attempting to wrap his legs around his chest with them not even reaching halfway around. Karkat was never letting John go. Never. It just was not to happen. What the little troll didn't know, was that John's birthday fell on a Monday. He was never taught that. He was also never taught that John was going to have to leave him for 9 hours starting the next morning at 7:15 and ending sometime about 3:45. He didn't know the shock he was in for the next morning and he didn't care. All he knew was that he wanted John and that John was right there when he needed him.


	9. Chapter 9

John sighed as he shook a blue sippy cup full of milk around to spread the temperature evenly. "What was that about, John?" Charles entered the kitchen, a freshly lit pipe set between his lips. "I guess the little guy had a bad dream about something or another." he murmured as he tested the milk on his wrist. "You're really good at that, John." His father teased, point at his temperature check. "Well, I did pass that Parental Unit they had us do first semester with flying colors." John chuckled, continually shaking the cup. "True. I guess they do prepare you for something then, huh?" Charles asked, removing the pipe to exhale. "Well, Cynthia did say that he had some sort of back ground with a previous owner or something." John said, blowing his bang out of his face. "I guess they didn't treat him right. He's such a sweetheart though. I can't see anyone hurting him for any reason." Charles just shrugged and replaced his pipe in his mouth. "I'm just going to give him this milk that I warmed and rock him. That ought to do the trick." John said, exiting the kitchen.

Karkat was curled up on the couch, wrapped in his fluffy towel that John decided was his. He was shivering slightly, not from cold, but from the sensations running through him. The dreams made his lower regions and wriggler nubs pulse in pain. Did he forget to mention that in that month, the human had ripped about three of his wriggler legs off prematurely? Yeah. He kept his head down and mumbled lightly to himself. John put the cup down on the coffee table and picked up the broken troll and held him against his chest. "Shhh. It's okay, Karkat. Calm down." he murmured, stroking his hair the way he liked. "I brought you some milk. You like milk, don't you?" John asked gently, picking up the cup as he sat down, holding Karkat as one would hold a baby.

After sniffing the milk, Karkat took the cup and drank from it. It was one of those cups you'd give a baby with developing motor skills, meaning that there were handles on both sides of the cup and Karkat looked down-right adorable with his little fists gripped around each handle, going half lidded as the warm milk made him feel better. John smiled. 'Poor little guy just needed some love, is all.' John thought to himself, rocking the troll just enough to make him fully relax.

Sooner than Karkat would have liked, the cup was empty. John tugged it away from him and set it on the table, holding Karkat up to rest his head on John's shoulder as he lightly hummed The Lumineer's Ho Hey into his troll's ear. "'On…" Karkat mumbled sleepily. "Yes?" John replied, keeping his beat in the song. "Rket sorry." the tone in Karkat's voice made him sound like a toddler who'd been caught taking candy from a store. "For what?" he asked, smiling a little. "'On did all for Rket. 'On not have to." he replied, yawning. "Well, don't be sorry. I wanted to." he said, rubbing soothing circles into his back. "As long as you're here, I'm always going to do things for you." he added, starting the chorus of the song over again. "'On….loves 'Rket?" he asked quietly and John could tell that he was struggling to stay awake. "Yes. John loves Karkat. I'll always love you little guy." he said, earning a small content sigh from the troll as he drifted into unconsciousness, this time having dreams of vanilla ice cream and John.


	10. Chapter 10

The next morning was...interesting to say the least. John got up as he usually did on Monday mornings and headed straight for the shower. He wasn't dirty; he'd taken a bath with Karkat the night before and then did nothing but feelings jam with the little fella until he fell asleep, but when John had extra time in the mornings to leave, he ended up talking to Dave for too long and missing his bus (which made Charles lecture him about being responsible on a 30 minute drive to his school). So he got in the shower, washed his hair and rubbed the kinks out of his shoulders with hot water. He went back into his room in two towels, blue for hair and darker blue for body. The little troll had woken up to the sound of the door opening and was rubbing his eyes at John. "'On?" he asked sleepily. "Mornin' Karkat." replied, going through his closet. "What 'On doing?" the troll asked, wrapping the sheets around himself and scooting the the edge of the bed. "Getting ready for school." he replied, pulling a green shirt over his head.

Karkat tilted his head. What was a school? "'kool?" he asked, staring John down as he dressed. "Yeah. I gotta go learn, Karkat." he said, trying to get his hair to cooperate with him. "Learn." Karkat repeated. John chuckled. He must have still been tired. "'Rket 'kool too?" he asked, struggling with the sentence. John processed it fairly quickly though. "Well, no. Pets aren't allowed in school." he said, sympathetically. Of course, with his very serious business and bakery to attend to, Charles wouldn't be home during the day, meaning that little Karkat would have to stay home by himself. There were, of course, troll daycares for trolls his age, but his allowance wouldn't start again until May, which meant that for the next two weeks, Karkat would have to stay home by himself and hopefully not tear everything apart.

"Where 'Rket go?" the little troll asked, his ears flickering. "You'll have to stay here, Karkat." John said, making sure he had all of his homework for the weekend. Karkat looked about to cry. "'On leave 'Rket?" he sniffled. "No, of course not! I mean, yes, but only because I have to." John was terrible at explaining things and his last sentence sent tears barrelling down Karkat's cheeks. "No, no, don't cry, Karkat! I'll be back!" he said in desperation. He picked up the digital clock by his bed. "Do you know how to count to ten?" he asked gently and the troll shook his head. He tore a piece of notebook paper from his binder and wrote 3:45 in big numbers. "When these numbers match the ones on the clock, I'll be back to play with you." John said, smiling as Karkat wiped his face to look at the numbers on the paper and then the clock. "'On learn 'Rket numbers?" he asked, furrowing his eyebrow. Sure, he knew what the clock was supposed to say, but he still didn't know how long it would be. "You want me to teach you the numbers?" he asked in disbelief. Karkat nodded. "'Rket wanna learn too." he said definately. "Alright. When I get home, I'll start teaching you your numbers." he smiled, stroking Karkat's hair lightly, bringing a smile to the troll's face as well. "John! Here comes the bus!" he heard his dad say and he threw his binder into his bookbag, turned his TV to Spongebob and kissed Karkat's cheek. "Alright, little guy. You know where the bathroom is, there are some snacks in the bottom of the fridge downstairs and here's something to entertain you." he ruffled Karkat's hair (God, that shit was soft) and ran downstairs, catching the bus as it pulled up.

Your name is Karkat Vantas and you want to curl up into a ball and die. When did John say he was getting back again? The troll was alright at first. John had kissed his cheek and that froze him momentarily, but after that adrenaline had passed, he had no idea what to do with himself. The yellow thing on the TV was entertaining, but sometimes Karkat didn't understand what was going on. Why would someone want to rip their pants? After that had gone off, something else to do with flying humans, colors, and something called Townsville came on and Karkat just couldn't sit still. He jumped down from the bed and went to the bathroom (again, that sink is too damned high) and went to see what Dad was doing. Really, he smelled something good and he was starting to get hungry.

In the kitchen, a very manly version of 'Sweet' by Phemic C, along with the smell of cupcakes, waffed from the kitchen, drawing Karkat closer. "'Ad?" he asked, peeping around the corner at the man who was in an apron, suit pants, a long sleeved white shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbow, and a tie that Karkat could barely see peeking out from under the apron. "Good morning, Karkat." Charles smiled, stopping his personal concert to look at the troll. "What doing?" he asked, going to the fridge and pulling. "I'm making cupcakes. Someone ordered them last minute." he said, sounding scornful at the last sentence. Karkat pulled something that had little sticks and a cup of yellow stuff in it with plastic over the top. "Are you hungry, little guy?" Charles asked, checking a little clock in the shape of a muffin and then putting it back down. Karkat nodded. The big human was nice. Just like John.

Charles washed his hands and cup an orange for Karkat to eat and filled the little blue sippy cup with milk again. "What this?" Karkat asked as the plate was set in front of him. "It's called an orange." he replied, wiping his hands on his apron. "Orange." he repeated and poked at it. Charles watched in fascination as Karkat sniffed, licked, poked at, and finally took a bite out of one wedge. It was as if he'd never had an orange wedge before. They were John's favorites as a toddler.

When his plate was empty, and his stomach full, Karkat climbed down the chair and tugged on Charles' apron. "'Rket done." he said, pointing to the table. "Don't worry about the dishes. I've got it." he replied, smiling. "You just run along."

Karkat retreated back to John's room and looked for entertainment. Well, there was the t.v., that now had the yellow square on it again, the little thing in the glass box that blew spit bubbles at him every time he passed it, or the bed. "Karkat, I'm leaving, alright?" he heard John's dad from downstairs and sighed. Well...a little nap couldn't hurt, right? Besides. All those oranges and milk were starting to feel good, settling in his tummy and a nap was in order. Maybe when he woke up, John would be home. Yeah! That's it. He'd sleep until John came home to teach him numbers. Genius Karkat strikes again!

* * *

A/N: I tried to do a chapter that was longer than usual, to see how it would work out, and I don't think I did that well. What do you guys think?


	11. Chapter 11

John was happy about two things when he got home. One, Charles had left a few muffins on the counter for him from his morning baking debut (he grabbed a few for himself and his troll). Two, his room and the upstairs area in general were still intact. "Karkat~?" he sang, waltzing into his room to see his little trooper. He was passed out on the bed, all wrapped up in the blankets, sleeping peacefully. He looked so much less stressed asleep than he did when awake. He almost felt bad for waking him up.

"Karkat? Karkat. Wake up, buddy." He cooed, the little troll's eyes fluttering, his eyelashes hitting pale cheeks a few times before his eyes stayed open. "'On?" he asked, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. "Hey Karkat!" he smiled widely, sitting on the bed. "You did it! You survived the 8 or 9 hours without me." John said, ruffling his hair. "Hours." He murmured, reaching for John. John picked him up, holding him against his chest. "Hey, there. Did you have a good day?" he asked and Karkat shook his head. "No 'On. Boring." Karkat replied. The little guy was totally adorable. Sleepy adolescent voices on trolls were almost too much to handle.

"You teach 'Rket numbers?" Karkat asked, becoming more awake than he was. "Of course! I even made some flashcards and I have some snacks for afterwards too." John smiled, pulling a few graham cracker sized cards from his bag. "Alright, Karkat." He smiled, holding up his hands, closed into fists. "One." He started, holding up a finger with one hand, the flashcard with the word 'one' written underneath it with the number itself on top of said word. "One." The little troll repeated, holding up a finger as well. "Two." John chuckled, switching flashcards and adding a finger. "'Oo." Karkat replied, not quite pronouncing the 'T', but John figured as he developed his pronunciation would get better.

They went through all the numbers up to 20, but then Karkat was becoming restless and he was paying more attention to the muffins on the table behind John, than to John himself. "Alright, Karkat. That's enough for today, yeah?" John asked, handing him a cupcake. "'Rket can count. Count to 'enty." he replied with a voice filled with satisfaction. He appeared to be proud of himself, a face splitting smile telling the whole story. "Next, I'll teach you how to spell them, so you'll know what they look like in writing." John said, wondering where his old phonics books went. He knew he still had them, because Charles saved every book the school sent home. He'd have to check the attic. That would definitely be where they were.

Karkat was indeed satisfied. He repeated his new numbers in his head over and over. He was never going to forget them. The first thing John actually taught him. How lucky could one troll be? John said something about spelling the numbers. He didn't know what that meant, but based on the flashcards John showed him, he could recollect the page on the laptop with the biscuit looking thing. It had numbers all over the page. Three, Two, Three-Four-Five (all of those were together. Karkat didn't know if it was pronounced 'Threety-Fourty-Fivey' or something, but it definitely was weird.). Maybe it was some sort of code? A code to making the biscuit? He didn't know, but that muffin hit the spot.

Karkat watched as John turned in circle for a full minute, going from the dresser, to his bookbag, to the dresser again. Then the supposedly off laptop made a noise that Karkat could only describe as 'things smashing into each other' and almost scared the grey off him. John strode over to the bed, sat on the edge, and swung his legs over and onto the bed, kicking off his shoes in the process. He picked up the little blue laptop and set it in his lap, Karkat snuggling up to John's side, trying to understand the ridiculously weird human letters and numbers everywhere.

The ridiculous human letters and numbers just so happened to be Dave.

TG: Egbert. I finally finished unpacking all that shit.

EB: Good job, Dave.

TG: Dude, I know you probably don't know, but turntables are heavy as shit.

TG: And with Bro and Dirk too busy with unpacking their robots and shit I had to do it myself.

TG: Not that I'd want greasy hands all over my babies.

TG: Anyway. Casa de Strider is now up and running.

TG: How goes things there?

EB: Pretty cool.

EB: I taught Karkat how to count to 20. The little guy seems really happy about it.

TG: sweet. So apparently now I'm not going to be homeschooled.

TG: so I'll be there at Florida High to call you a dork everyday.

John's eyebrows knitted together. He definitely was not a dor- wait. Dave's going to his school! He'd see Dave everyday!

EB: cool. And I'm not a dork.

TG: what ever dude. Ask your dad if you can come over after school tomorrow.

TG: you still have to get that smuppet that was custom made just for you.

EB: dude, no. i'm not asking if you really ordered that thing.

TG: calm down, egderp. i didn't.

TG: like i said. those things are hella expensive.

Charles peeked his head into John's room. "Hey John. I'm home." he said, looking around John's room. "Hey dad!" John said, smiling at his father. "How went the serious business today?" Charles chuckled. "It went great. Say, John…" the father stepped fully into the room, scratching his head in what John perceived as nervousness. Why was his father nervous? "What would you say if I told you that I quit my office job, finished paying for my bakery, and renamed it to "Serious Business Cafe"?" he asked, watching his son's face. "So…" John started. Why did adults have to say things so complicated-like? "You quit the serious business to start up the Serious Business?" John asked, looking happy, but confused. "Yeah. I found that I enjoy baking more than I did sitting at the cubicle and wasting coffee on my tie every morning." his dad replied sheepishly and John lept up and hugged his father. "Dad, that's great! You can do what you love to do all day long!" John smiled.

Charles had been worried that John wouldn't take the news so greatly, seeing as how he would have been embarrassed as a kid to have to tell people that his dad owned a bakery, but he had such a cool son that he didn't even care.

Karkat watched the heart touching moment from the bed. Why were dad and John so happy? He heard something about a cahfeh, but he had no idea what that was. So, he picked up John's computer and pretended he was John. He typed all sorts of messages to this "Daev" person.

EB: nslfsgtnlsgnslrkg

EB: srgsfghtdhdxjbgdbnfjgbdfugbndfg

TG: dude, what the hell?

Yep. Karkat was an official John, and if the real John didn't hurry up, he'd take his place. But, John was too busy congratulating his dad on chasing his dreams and having a bakery. Both of them were so happy, because as we all know; John loves his Daddy.

* * *

Hey guys! Now, after all the snickering I went through to put it there, Yuukilover was the only one to recognize the PewDiePie quote I snuck in the last chapter. Hella awesome dude! I hope you enjoyed this chapter~

P.S: I wonder if any of you will see what I did at the end of this chapter.


	12. Chapter 12

The whole family moved downstairs (karkat included) to the kitchen, where Charles talked about his different business strategies, decoration plans, and how he'd already found someone to bake with him willingly. "Her name is Tracy Lalonde. She seemed kind of off, but she had a genuine tone to to her voice." Charles said, sipping his usual after work coffee. "She said back in Texas she was known for her cakes and cookies." John looked up from his cup of juice. "Texas? That's where Dave and his family just moved from." John replied, tilting his head to the side. "You think they're related?" Charles shrugged. "Maybe, son. Your friend Dave moved to Florida?" he replied, then asked, raising an eyebrow. "Yeah. They just got here yesterday as a matter of fact. Dave invited me over on Saturday, you know like a reunion, and he wants to meet Karkat, but I told him that I'd have to see what was going on." John said, taking a sip from his juice. This was how he almost always got what he wanted when it came to his father. He guessed it had something to do with the fact that he kind of asked to go, as well as the fact of establishing that he meant to take Dave up on his offer and go. "Well, we hadn't planned anything, and you're pretty much homebound with the mixture of Karkat and not having spending money, so you should be able to go." Dad Egbert said shrugging, and John knew that no matter what happened, that meant he had permission to go over to his Texan friend's house.

Meanwhile, Karkat was off exploring. He hadn't had a chance to do it while John was gone; it hadn't crossed his mind. He'd considered saving it for the next time John participated in the school thing, but that was just too long away. He climbed down from the couch where he had been playing with some sort of toy John had found him that said the numbers up to ten. Karkat felt pride swell in his chest at knowing more than the human toy did. However, it had really pretty lights, so he'd put up with it longer than he thought he would.

The little troll wandered around the bottom floor. The weird, dark hole in the wall in the pieces of trees in it interested Karkat the most out of everything. Why was it there? What was the purpose of that thing? He went up to it and paced in front of it. He squeaked at it. It didn't respond. He stuck his tongue out at it. No taunting response. Jeez. That used to rile up Vriska back at the center. Then she'd usually make him shove his face into his water bowl with that freaky power thing she had. He decided to investigate it further. He crawled into the little hole, letting out a little squeak when he headbutted the wall by mistake. As he realized what had happened, he bursted into a fit of giggles. The fireplace was just Karkat's side, if not a bit more roomy and it was the perfect napping place. It was slightly warmer than the rest of the house, and that made it kind of stuffy, but it was more relaxing than anything. He decided that this would be his new hang out spot. This was perfect.

Your name is Dave Strider and Jesus are you sick of your family. After John went dork mode, he was about to reply with some sick rhymes that were made up spur of the moment when Dirk had called him from the bottom of the stairs. "Yo, lil bro! A little help here?" He called for Dave, what seemed to be a huge metal box standing upright next to him. As soon as Dave caught sight of the box, he started back up the stairs. Maybe he could fake as if he had headphones in his ear the whole time, and hadn't heard his sibling. "Where you going, punk? You too weak to help your old brother with the big metal box of doom?" He'd taunted, and as a Strider, that wasn't going to roll with Dave. He sighed and went back down the stairs, eyebrows clearly depicting attitude. "Who're you calling a punk?" He asked, shoving his hands in his pockets as he tromped down the stairs. "You, punk." He replied, grinning. "Help me with this. It's just a few robo parts. Nothing too major for your weak, punk arms." He taunted, knowing it would grind the younger Strider's gears. "Shut up and lift the box." Dave said, tilting the box in the direction of the stairs for easier access. Dirk chuckled and grabbed his end of the surprisingly light box. "Upsie Daisy, lil weakling."

After the constant taunting from Dirk and the urges to let the box go and flatten his brother once and for all, they finally got the box upstairs. "Thanks lil Bro. By the way, Bro wants to see you." Dave deadpanned. Of course. That was probably the only reason he was called out of his room in the first place. He was in no condition for a strife with bro right now. With John and the little troll coming over tomorrow after school (potentially) he couldn't be all cut up and bleeding for the first impression. He climbed up to the roof, katanaless, and with his hands up in surrender. "Bro." he spoke and before he could even get himself fully prepared for his speech Bro Strider had lunged at him, seemingly aiming to kill. "God damnit, Bro!" he yelled, ducking under his brother's arms swinging around.

Bro Strider, however, knew already that Dave was going to invite someone over. He didn't know who it was, but whenever Dave was cleaning, he was either sick or inviting someone over and sickness had already been ruled out. Maybe a few bruises could test their friendship. "Broooooo!" Dave whined from his place behind his brother. "No strifing!" he whined again, but Bro Strider isn't taking no for an answer. He turned around, swinging at his brother, catching his shoulder. "Shit Bro!" Dave yelled. "You already know damned well I have someone coming over!" Dave yelled, still dodging one of many shitty sword swings. "Yeah? And so a few bruises wont hurt cha." Bro replied, resting his blade on his shoulder. "Alright Bro. You won this time. What do you want?" Dave asked, trying to keep himself upright. Bro crossed the space over to Dave and picked him up. "I just wanna meet the kid. You know. No secrets from your old Bro, hm?" Dave nodded, floating in between consciousness and non consciousness. "Fine. Suit yourself." he mumbled before blacking out.


	13. Chapter 13

The day was Tuesday. It was approximately 6:30 in the morning when John's alarm on his phone went off. As usual, he'd fell asleep with his computer on, Pesterchum open where the last person he was talking to was Jade. But this particular morning, before he could even turn his alarm off, Dave was pestering him.

[turntechGodhead {TG} began pestering ectoBiologist {EB} at 6;30 AM]

TG; yo egderp.

John didn't know if he should stop Ashe from singing The Gypsy Bard or answer Dave. Well…he liked the song, so he answered Dave.

EB: what dave?

TG: nothing much.

TG: just telling you that I requested all your classes in school

TG: oh and it's up to you to show me around and shit

TG: see ya in school, egderp.

[turntechGodhead {TG} ceased pestering ectoBiologist {EB} at 6;33 AM]

Seeing as how he'd just woken up, he scratched the back of his head and turned his alarm off. He hadn't quite processed the information, but it hit him as soon as the water of the shower hit him. Dave was not only going to be at his school, but in all his classes as well! He got incredibly excited as he rubbed shampoo through his hair. He was going to be seen with the cool Dave Strider!

After his dorkfest in the shower, he went back to his room to dress, Karkat as expected, waking up asking him what he was doing and where he was going in that adolescent morning troll voice. "I'm going to school, Karkat. Just like yesterday." He replied, pulling his favorite Pac-Man shirt over his head. "'Gain?" Karkat asked, seemingly upset with John for ditching him for school again. "Yeah. Okay…show me five fingers, Karkat." John said, chuckling. Karkat counted his fingers one by one until he had five of them up, showing John grey palms upright. John squatted to Karkat's height and then removed two fingers. "Yesterday I went and I have to go today." He said as he removed the fingers. "What about other 'ree?" Karkat asked, showing John the proof of his question. "I have to go three more days before the weekend, Karkat." He says putting the fingers down. "'Eekend." Karkat repeated, looking at his remaining three fingers with pure determination.

"John! Breakfast!" Charles called from downstairs, reminding John of the sickening sweet smell of frosting, that he was sure would get into his clothes, that had made it's presence very clear in the Egbert household. . As the thoughts went through his head, he could pretty much hear people calling him a cupcake because of the smell that he was sure would work it's way into his clothes making him smell as if he lived in a bakery. "C'mon Karkat. Breakfast." John said, picking the troll up as per demand and carrying him downstairs.

John had never saw a spread as perfect as the one his dad had laid out for them. Pancakes, Waffles, Cereals of all kinds! John had been to buffets with worse service than what he was getting at home. Karkat looked like his eyes were going to pop out of his head. He'd never had that much of anything to call his own. "Well, don't just stand there with your mouths open. The food is getting cold." Charles smiled.

John set Karkat up, putting whatever he thought he wanted on his plate for him along with a fork that was disregarded before it was even noticed. John then sat himself down with a stack of blueberry pancakes that he knew it was impossible for him to finish. Outside, John heard the bus go by and silently thanked the opening of the Serious Business for him not having to ride that evil yellow death trap.

"Oh, by the way, Tracy is coming over this afternoon, and I'd like you to meet her. So ride the bus home. You can pick up Karkat that way as well." Dad Egbert said behind what couldn't have been the same cup of coffee he had when John entered the room. John nodded. "Alright." John said through a mouthful of pancake. "Well, we have to leave within the next ten minutes to get to school on time and Karkat seems to have had enough of his breakfast." John's dad said, laughing.

Karkat looked as if he'd thoroughly enjoyed his breakfast, managing to have pancake/waffle all around his mouth and syrup everywhere. "Alright, lil guy. Bath time." John said, removing Karkat from his chair and back up the stairs. "'On bath?" Karkat asked, looking up at his caretaker. "No. I've already taken one. This one is for you." he replied, turning on the water on. "Oh." John gave Karkat his rag and made a mental note to get him a little red loofah. Shower head, shoes, and a kid sized red loofah.

After five minutes of making sure Karkat didn't get water all over the place or in his hair (He really needed to get him a shower head. Why wasn't this month over yet?) he wrapped the troll in the fluffy towel that now had a spot on the towel rack and changed him into another old shirt of his and turned the Tv on. Then, he had an idea. "Okay, Karkat. You remember the numbers, right?" he asked and Karkat nodded. "'Rket count to twenty." he nodded. "So, there's also something called letters and that's how you spell things and read." Karkat tilted his head to the side, but the look on his face was so determined that John felt he was up to the challenge. He turned his laptop on and scrolled through a few sights before finally remembering that his cable provider had a kids section on their website that taught basic Enlglish, Spanish, and Math. He signed Karkat up. "Welcome! Karkat!" John was surprised that it pronounced it correctly, but grateful nonetheless. "For 'Rket?" he asked, wide eyed. "Yup. Use this little spot to move the cursor." John demonstrated and Karkat following. "To click something, press the little button on the left." he said, chuckling as Karkat clicked the "Get Started!" button. "Now, you can do this, or watch tv all day while I'm gone." Karkat nodded. "John! We gotta go!" his father called. "Alright, Karkat." he clicked the brightly colored 'ABC's' button and kissed Karkat on the forehead. "I'll be back later."

John left out of his room as the stereotypical alphabet song started.


End file.
